I realised I often set myself up for situations I cannot wait to get out of. Like how, in the heat of the moment I’d agree myself to dates with people and then three days later I’d give it some thought and start to nitpick. I’d start to see the flaws in that person and then realise that person I don’t really want to go out with him.

Then I’d bail.

It’s happened so many times I already lost count. So many dates I’ve canceled out on just because I gave it one thought too many and realised that I don’t really want to go out with this person.

Is this normal?

Not that I obsess about my dates. But I’d just sit and think, and start to nitpick just by the way he converses virtually. All down to the finest detail like the kind of words he chooses to use, and the questions he asks, and the way he asks them.

Ok, maybe I am a little obsessive, maybe just that little bit. And I can already see the kind of questions coming my way, if I’m not going to be open to the idea of meeting new people how the hell am I going to find someone nice to hang out with?

Seriously, I don’t know.

But all I’m asking for is to hang out with someone who doesn’t want sex.

Is that too difficult to ask?

On a separate note, I find myself thinking about the Gargoyle dream again.




  1. you have ocd.

  2. But but..I don’t wash my hands compulsively.

    At least not yet..*sheepish*

  3. would it change anything to say- i dont (at least not now) want to bone you? (laughs)

  4. and in denial too, if i might add.

  5. Mark: nothing a couple of shots of tequila cannot cure. =)

  6. It’s not really too difficult to ask but considering the circumstances you are in, it’s pretty difficult to see things outside your own paradigm.

  7. Tony: hmm *raises brows*

  8. whatever floats your boat 😉

  9. Caught between warring polarities, I envy your state of carefree sexual liberation.

    And sort of wish I could hang out with someone attractive who -does- want sex.

    But not really.

    But really.

  10. mark: haha ;P better than sipping margaritas by kallang river

    sneexe: hmmm, why?

  11. i fail to see the relevance between attaining relaxation by a water body as opposed to habouring juvenile thoughts. ;P

  12. And I thought you were going to disappear?

  13. Mark: ah, nevermind, neither do it. hurhur.

    Tony: me? disappear?

  14. *shrug* … I wish I knew. Hormones, probably.

  15. heh..=)

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