The Cute Sex Monologues.

Seeing as to how I haven’t been getting any action for awhile, there have been no stories of late. But thanks to the good fortune of a friend, D, here’s one just for laughs.

To begin with, I suppose you could say that she was pretty much the ideal fuck. Not that I was given any information about her looks, but I suppose you’d have to look fairly decent. I trust D’s taste in girls. But CSG didn’t like condoms (woohoo to those of you who don’t like fucking with condoms – safe sex alert!), and apparently, she swallows.

Sounds the perfect fuck, no?

Wrong.

The list of complaints included speaking in chinese. Not that it was a big problem, but my friend here isn’t just that kinda person to speak chinese with you on a regular basis. In his words, she was “fuckin’ ching-chong cheena”.

Of course, the biggest problem here for him, at least up until then, was that she “squeals way too much” and kept saying “kiss me”, hence the Cute Sex title given to her, plus all the cute smiles and squealing and everything.

I don’t really get how “cute” sex can be. But seriously, CUTE SEX? I don’t know about anyone else reading this but really, unless you’re 20 and below and just beginning to understand the carnal pleasures of sex, how could anyone tolerate acting cute during sex? Ok, this thought is making me sick.

To top it all off, she started bugging him for a day or two after. I doubt anyone reading this here likes post-sex clingy girls, so an acting cute-post sex-clingy girl was a nightmare. I’m sure you can imagine.

Did I also mention that, she apparently tastes sour down there as well?

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2 Comments

  1. I cannot picture “cute sex”.

  2. neither can i, really. but i have been told it was a less erm, hardcore version of hentai.

    go figure =)


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